The sketchy and inconsistent blog of Bethie Engstrom...

Sunday, June 10, 2012

Ocean inside me

Medium: 2B
Funny thing about this is that when I got up the nerve to show some of my family this picture, I warned them that it was a little abstract (They always grimace when the "A" word is mentioned... and I used to as well... but now I have found my appreciation for the abstract as well as the fine art. I don't judge them together because you just... can't), and my dad nodded at me and took this sketch and looked at it. And looked, and looked and looked...
To be honest, I got a really, ton, a lot but mostly little-ish nervous. =)
He finally said that, yes, it was abstract, but he could see it now, "you're looking out of a cave!"
*facepalm*

Oh well. I tried. (and if it's not just my lovable family and I truly need to work more on this, it's a figure with the ocean inside it... =)
All that said, when I said that I had to get my nerve up to show to my family, I feel like I should explain. I love my family, and they love looking at whatever I show them.
My only hesitation is that I sometimes don't believe them (does that sound bad - hopefully you can understands what I mean=)... and lots of the time I just want the hard truth ("you need to work more on this!").
There are times when all I want to do is hide up in a hole and draw and paint and not show anybody!
I sometimes hesitate (who am I kidding, I hesitate every time!) whenever I show/post a drawing/painting... I'm not afraid of harsh critics (I can only dream of them), rather, I'm afraid of myself... of what sort of monster I'll become if I keep showing people, and they "ooo" and "aahhh" over my work, say it's pretty or whatever... I get scared that I'll just stop. Right there. That praise alone will get good enough for me (and my pride, my horrible, nagging pride will get the better of me, has in the past so I don't doubt it will in the future. By God's grace alone I stand).
I don't know... I'm sometimes hope I'm just overeating in my head... but other times, I think I'm making sense (sort of, in a rambling kind of way I guess).
If you've read this- I'm impressed... (I don't even know if I would have!)

Anywho - Happy Sketching everyone!

7 comments:

Heather said...

funny, i got it right away....i love that the ocean is inside the figure....we all have the power of the ocean inside of us....let it flow....and keep drawing!

ArtMuseDog and Carol said...

Love it ~ wonderful sketch and I got it right away too! ~ Families can be the hardest to please ~ trust yourself! ~ ~ thanks, ^_^ (A Creative Harbor)

Molly said...

I love that your family is interested in what you're creating, even if the don't always get it.

Indefinitely have the ocean in me, so your piece resonated for me, but I think you need to just keep creating what speaks to you and don't worry about what the critics (or praises) are saying when it comes to your creative process.

Thanks for sharing.

Tammie Lee said...

hello,
i saw what you said it is, a figure with the ocean inside of it. but i now can see what your father saw.

your idea for this piece is wonderful.

i think that is the wonderful thing about art.... it is different to each person, just like everything in life. that is one thing i enjoy about my blog friends, i see my art new through their messages.

Alexandra said...

This piece is wonderful! I love how you created this and what great emotion you captured simply within the crashing waves alone! Well done. :)

Tracey Fletcher KIng said...

Be careful what you wish for because my beloved ones are brutally honest... and sometimes you need a little gentleness... it is hard putting your work out there and this has a huge amount of promise... I for one am glad you shared it... have a great creative week...xx

Lynn said...

I think we have a hard time believing our families kudos because we know they love us and they might feel obligated to say something nice. But I have come to really believe my brother and my son both of whom are very effusive and I can tell they mean it. I can believe my daughter too as she is very very sparing with her compliments so when they do come I know she really means it.
Or my friend, D, who sometimes says next to nothing, then I know she really is not crazy about the piece.
You just have to really know the source and you can figure it out.

I saw the wave right off and felt it did have to do with a person holding the waves in but not able too so they were crashing on the rock...am I close? I think for me it's a bit more than an abstract...just not totally blatant.

Oh, and I like it. :-)